Mother's Day

I know that a lot of people don't like Mother's Day. I totally get it. It's overcommercialized, a Hallmark holiday. It reinforces the idea that a woman's life purpose can only be fulfilled if/when she becomes a mom (& it shortchanges dads as well since Father's Day receives far less pomp & circumstance). It is a very hard day for those who've lost their moms, those who've lost a child, those who have not yet been able to have a child, and those whose family don't appreciate them enough (daily or yearly). There are lots of thought-provoking, well-written, and "that's a great point" blogs that I've seen posted about these issues and I tend to agree with them.

But this year Mother's Day has hit me a little differently. I'm all for the idea that people should celebrate the ones they love year round; this week has just given me a new view about what motherhood means to me and how I can use this day to count my blessings and evaluate my perspective. We are so fortunate to have such a sunny little girl who radiates enthusiasm and joy. Every day she gets more fun and her love for us grows leaps and bounds. She now says "I love you" unprompted and full of fierce passion and it knocks the wind out of me every time. 

I have always had the perspective that A is a little person. I know some people feel like babies aren't really like people for years, but that was never me. Her personality seemed to shine through fairly early (like most babies, I imagine) but this is hitting me really hard this week. Her growth has really made me realize how much fun I have with my little buddy and how (fast forwarding one and a half decades from now) one day she will move away and that she won't always think I'm her best friend.

Parenting is hard.

Of course, all of this has given me new perspective on how difficult it is for my family that I had to move so far away and don't visit often. I can understand why my mom wants me to call her every day because I feel like I would want to talk to A every minute of the day. 

This post has become sadder than I expected but it fits with the melancholic air I've been breathing this week. My musings have also went to things that I appreciate about my own mom. There are lots of things I am grateful for, like her unconditional love, her generosity, that she isn't judgmental, and she always believed in us and our abilities. What stands out to me the most, though, is her courage, ambition, and intelligence that led her to leave southeastern Kentucky to get her degree. She went to school when my brother and I were little. Her family really did not want her to leave and had difficulty understanding why she would want to go to college. I remember going to class with her when I didn't have school, reading through her textbooks, and the day that she graduated from pharmacy school. I was 9 and my brother was 5. I can't even imagine that tenacity but she and my dad wanted us to have a better life and she had the guts to follow her dream. I am fiercely proud of her for that. She made me value my education and showed me that a woman can be a mom and have a career. I often wonder what A will take from me as she grows and what she will be most proud of and thankful for.

Chad works tomorrow so he already gave me my Mother's day gifts (technically I ordered the prints because I've been wanting to make this set since forever). He finally finished the corner bookshelf for our cookbooks and got me a beautiful hanging plant. I hear there is talk of doughnuts for breakfast before he goes to work and pizza when he comes home. Sounds good to me.