In the past, I have tended to shy away from New Year's resolutions. Approximately 45% of Americans make them. The most common resolutions are to lose weight, get organized, spend less/save more, enjoy life to the fullest, and quit smoking. Fortunately I have never smoked but all of the other resolutions are fair game. The data on success in resolutions tend to be fairly bleak (though a fairly recent study suggests that, for women at least, making a goal public and getting support from your friends increases success somewhat). However, I have been thinking for awhile that I need to do a little more "practice what I teach" in terms of therapy techniques and behavioral strategies. This is an issue not uncommon among my friends and colleagues. When stressed, I do a fairly good job with DBT skills like being mindful and reducing vulnerability to negative emotions. But all the other stuff gets a bit forgotten. So, rather than set resolutions per se, I've spent the last week or so thinking about values and goals, ala behavioral activation and acceptance and commitment therapy. Most experts agree that there are approximately ten domains in life that some people "value" (i.e., family, intimate relations, parenting, social relations, employment, personal growth, recreation, spirituality, community, and physical well-being). It is unrealistic to try to tackle all areas at once. In fact, striving for a goal at all tends to use valuable self-control, leaving other areas of your life vulnerable to undesirable influences and outcomes (interested readers should check out my friend and colleague's blog post, The Dark Side of New Year's Resolutions). This helps explain why, in the last year as I have been growing and raising a baby and moving toward reappointment and tenure, my house has become a disaster and I no longer have the energy to bake. Sorry Chad, something had to give.
Anyhow, I have been thinking a lot about these areas and ways that I could improve. Small, concrete, measurable goals with those core values in mind.
- Cook one meal per week (Value: marital relationship, physical well-being). I am not even pretending that I will eat healthy every day. I think a by-product of being more involved with my food will be that I make better choices on a regular basis. This will also help take some of the load off of Chad since he has been handling most of the meals. At first, I plan for all of the meals to be made using our slow cooker but hopefully I will be able to add in some additional meals as I get back in the groove.
- Eat at least two lunch meals from home (Value: physical well-being). This is tough for me since I don't like most of the microwaveable dinners and I don't eat salad. Cooking regularly will help, though.
- Move Alaina to her crib (Value: parenting, marital relationship). It's time. While part of me is sad that she will be in her own room, I really believe this is important.
- Stay off Facebook at work (Value: employment). I really want to be more productive this year. I started at OSU in a good place in terms of publications and my first few years have gone pretty well. However, the last year has been tough in terms of productivity. I fully recognize that this is completely normal as I have to shift priorities and balance personal and professional responsibilities. Spending time on Facebook (or Pinterest or other random websites) will not help me get tenure. I am not giving it up; just shifting it off my work computer. If I feel I must check FB during lunch, etc. I am only allowing myself to check it from my phone.
- Complete Jillian Michael's 30-day shred DVD (Value: physical well-being). My sister, Kristin, and several friends have agreed to start this. I am least confident in my ability to achieve this goal. Trying to find a 30 minute period at home when Alaina isn't requiring my attention seems insurmountable! I ordered the DVD, so that's a good first step. I'm just hoping it doesn't meet the same fate as my still-shrink wrapped Prenatal Pilates DVD that I intended to use while pregnant. Getting Alaina in her crib would mean I may be able to get up earlier or shower in the evening without fear of waking her so there are some possibilities here...
- Possibly seeming counter to the above, Kristin and I are going to embark on a mission to create one recipe per month from the Baked books (Value: family relationship, recreation). I'm sure I will blog about each one so you guys can enjoy this with us.
- Find a church (Value: spirituality).
I will probably check in on these goals periodically. I have done fairly well this first week of the year (like 75% of people who make resolutions...). I made a meal in the crockpot on Thursday (and had leftovers for lunch on Friday!). I stayed off Facebook on Thursday and Friday (I only went in to work W-F this week). Alaina currently is napping happily in her crib. And my DVD is waiting for me in my mailbox...so, not a bad start.
No comments:
Post a Comment